Thorns among the Barbs

Thoughts on my journey to heaven

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prone to wander – part 2

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A while ago I wrote about my struggle to wander from God, and my stress for not fitting in with those I rub shoulders with daily.  It is interesting that as I pray more, and work this salvation out with God he reveals a bit more of the picture. 

In a previous post I spoke of my coworkers who are not Christ followers.  I have watched them, and asked the Lord to show me them through his eyes. Dangerous prayer if you are sensitive like I am.  but a good prayer, because the Lord is always willing to reveal insight.

I have begun to understand that both women share several common bonds, although they are seperated by over 20 some years in age.  Each women fears being alone, and have entertained the idea of living with a man outside of the bonds of marriage.   Both share a strong opinion that they are in charge and often overwhelm others with their “take charge” attitude.  They both know pain and sorrow in their lives and they like to anesthetize their pain with alcohol and sex.  And they don;t hesitate discussing this in the work arena to the shock and dismay of those in earshot.    But the most significant issue both women share is their willingness to compromise their lives in little and big ways (don;t we all do this!) , to the point that they do not want to hear God, nor allow his word to pierce their soul.

What started out as something very personal to me, in that I felt very rejected by them, has deepened to an understanding that it is not me, but Christ in me, that is an foul odor and reminder of death in their lives. 

I am convinced that there is enough of God’s wiring and programming placed in each of us to begin to recognize God in our lives.  I am asking God to do the work to quicken their spirits, pierce their hard hearts, and speak deep into their souls as only he can.  These women share one more common bond – neither realizes how despirately they need to know God, and to exerience the joys of his salvation. 

No, no, no!  I may be prone to wander, but when God shows his insight of someone else I have to just drop to my knees and thank God for his salvation of my life, knowing that at one time I was in the company of those who did much worse.  May I never loose that sense of understanding of where I came from, nor judge those who walk this life without Christ. 

The next line of my favorite hymn goes

“Here is my heart lord, take and seal it, seal it for thy courts above.”

Amen

Written by Barbara Bloom

September 18, 2008 at 1:22 PM

Posted in Uncategorized

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